Wednesday, 11 November 2009
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Tips For A Christian Marriage
I am my beloved's and my beloved is Mine - Song of Solomon 6:3
In a Christian marriage we must keep God first and we must honor our marriage and one another. We need to respect and encourage one another as well as communicate with one another and be quick to listen and slow to speak by carefully choosing our words as James tells us. We also need to pray with one another, read the Bible together and attend Church together whenever the doors are open.
When you choose to marry you become one (One Flesh) and it means that you choose to love your spouse and be patient with them and kind to them. You should not be not envious, boastful, proud, rude or self-seeking with them. You must not be easily angered or keep a record of wrongs. Finally you must be protective, trustful and always persevere because love never fails. All of this is spelled out by Paul in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 and so we must do the following:
- Be faithful to your spouse.
- Be hopeful with your spouse.
- Be kind to your spouse.
- Be patient your spouse.
- Be truthful to your spouse.
- Be understanding towards your spouse.
- Be unselfish with your spouse.
- Encourage your spouse.
- Forgive your spouse.
- Grow and mature with your spouse.
- Help your spouse.
- Honor your spouse.
- Love your spouse.
- Please your spouse.
- Speak in love to your spouse.
- Trust your spouse.
Because the bond created in a Christian marriage by a man and woman is before God then God is in your hearts. If you adhere to the rules above you, your spouse and your marriage will be blessed.
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Marriage From The Beginning
Several years ago when I was a home inspector I inspected a friend of ours house named Angelique before her and her husband bought it. There was a minor stress crack above one of the bedroom doors and I told her the house had settled and it was probably an old crack. To be safe I inspected the foundation and could not find anything obvious on the outside. On the inside the basement was sheet rocked and carped. As an inspector I could not pull up the carpet or take down the sheetrock and assumed all was well and they moved in shortly afterwards.
Two years or so later to make a long story short the foundation began to break apart and they had to shell out 40K dollars to have the house repaired. My wife and I stopped by one day and her yard was all dug up around the house. The house was covered on the inside with concrete dust and they had plastic on all the upstairs floors. The basement had holes in the ground around the inside edges where they were mud jacking and their basement was unlivable. It was sad to see and for them it was just the beginning of a nightmare. For the entire summer the house was being repaired and was hard to live in.
Eventually they got most of their money back for the repairs but it took two years to recover. As the inspector of the home I could have been liable for the damages in court. However their insurance man and I met the mudjackers at the house when they did their initial assessment. We soon discovered that the previous owners had known the foundation was bad and did not disclose it to their realtor. The mudjackers found that the previous owners had used silicone to repair several large basement floor cracks and glued carpet over it to hide the repairs and since they did not disclose it they were sued for the damages.
In our Christian lives there are lots of similarities to Angelique‘s misadventures. A marriage like a house needs to be built on a solid foundation and both couples should disclose everything. There should be no secrets and nothing should be covered up because communication is essential. If a Christian home is not filled with the spirit of God a remodeling occurs and the home can be hard to live in. But when God and the Holy Spirit lives in the home in the end damages can be recovered.
As Christian couples in our marriages need to build on a solid foundation and be wise and not foolish. In Matthew 7:24-27 Jesus described someone who builds their house on sand as Foolish and one who builds their house on rock are Wise.
Jesus said in Luke 6:46-49 that a home built on a strong foundation of rock which is Jesus and the word of God is different from one built without a foundation or without God and the bible but Why? Because those who build on a Christian foundation can weather the storms of life by their faith because God and the bible is the blueprint for life or a roadmap.
To understand us as individuals we need to look at the Genesis Creation Timeline.
Day
God Created
Genesis
1
Heaven and earth
1:1
1
Light
1:3
1
Day and Night (Evening\Morning)
1:5
2
Sky
1:8
3
Land And Sea
1:10
3
Vegetation and Plants
1:11
4
Moon, Sun Stars
1:14
5
Fish and Birds
1:20
6
Animals
1:24
6
Man (Male\Female)
1:26
6
Gives Dominion to man
1:29
7
God Rests
2:2
God made man last on the 6th day of creation and rested on the 7th day. If you read Genesis 1: 26-30 in verse 27 we see that God created man and woman in God’s image. Then in verse 28 God blessed “them” both so they’re equals. Then in verse 28 we see God’s purpose for marriage and we are to fill the earth by being fruitful and multiplying.
If you are in a childless marriage for one reason or another how does this apply to you? Well you can adopt or be foster parents for children if you can. You can also help to raise spiritual children like step children, grandchildren, nephews, nieces or other children in your life such as those of close family friends or even the neighbor’s children.
For new Christians when reading Genesis chapter 2 and in particular Genesis 2:7-8 it is confusing for most of them as well as some believers. In Genesis 1:26 we read that God created male and female. But in 2:7 we read that God created Adam (Hebrew for Man). The key here is to understand that Chapter 1 is taken as an overview of creation. Whereas Chapter 2 deals with verse 1:26 in detail in verse 2:4 with the creation of the first man or Adam and the first woman Eve which in the Hebrew sounds like Man as it does in English.
Why was man created and why was he given dominion over all that had the breath of life in it? – To take care of it as in verse 2:5 so that he could work it which means to tend and take care of it. So God created Adam in 2:7 and put him into Eden in 2:15.
One of Gods primary purposes for marriage is stated in Genesis 2:18. In 2:18 God said that it is not good for man (Adam) to be alone and he needed a helper that was suitable for him. One that could help him care for all that God had created for the earth. From this we see that Man was not meant to be alone and needed a woman to be his helper or partner who is suitable for him.
In summation a Christian home needs to be built on a strong foundation and we need to be wise and not foolish. To do so we have Jesus and the word of God present in ourselves, our marriage and in our home. God provided woman to man as a helper and both were blessed as equals.
When reading Genesis 2:21-24 in verse 24 when a man marries he is to leave his mother and father or their house and be united to his wife in their own house and they become one flesh and so they become one and not remain two. When God said - in the various Bible version translations - that a man is United, Joined or Cleave(s) it means Faithful Love. Jesus himself echoed this in Matthew 19:4-6 but added therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate. Paul tells us in Hebrews 13:4 that marriage is honorable and that the marriage bed should be kept pure and undefiled.
Paul also states in 1 Corinthians 11:11-12 that God created men and women as interdependent. Women are not independent of men, and men are not independent of women. Adam was created before Eve and even though Eve the first woman came from Adam ever since then all men and women have been born from women. No one is completely independent because everything comes from God who is the Source of all life. Paul in 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 tells us that intimacy is important as we seen in Genesis 1:28.
In Genesis 3: 1-6 where was Adam when the serpent was temping Eve? He was with her.
When they ate the fruit sin came into the world because of disobedience to God but was this Eves fault? – No because Adam was with her and failed to protect his wife from sin and temptation. Here Adam failed himself, his wife, their union or marriage and failed God. We cannot always force our mate to obey God but we can pray for them and with love admonish them. In Genesis 3: 7-13 when God asked Adam in verse 11 he blamed Eve the woman in verse 12 but it is important to note that when we sin we are to blame not someone else.
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Suffering And Trials
Listed here are some verses that I refer to when counseling others when dealing with trials and suffering.
- Christ shows us how suffer (1 Peter 2:21-24)
- Christ’s followers will suffer (Matthew 16:21-26)
- God expects us to grow through trials (James 1:2-4)
- God knows what he is doing (Romans 8:28)
- Have peace in trials (John 16:33)
- Jesus can help us through our suffering (Hebrews 2:11-18)
- Jesus understood our struggles (John 15:18)
- No more suffering in Jesus Christ’s Kingdom (Revelation 21:4)
- Suffering ends in glory (2 Corinthians 4:17-18)
- Suffering helps us to comfort others who are suffering (2 Corinthians 1:3-7)
- Trials fade in comparison to the joy we have with Christ (Philippians 3:7-11)
- Trials help us develop patience (Romans 5:1-5)
- We are promised rest from trials (Matthew 11:28-30)
- We can expect to suffer (2 Corinthians 6:3-13)
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The Apostles Of Jesus
The Apostles Of Jesus
The word Apostle comes from the Greek Apostollos and means “One sent forth”. In scripture there are only supposed to be 12 apostles to fulfill Matthew 19:28 where Jesus said "I tell you the truth, at the renewal of all things, when the Son of Man sits on his glorious throne, you who have followed me will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel". (NIV)
Because Judas betrayed Jesus and was no longer with the apostles he had to be replaced to bring the number back up to 12. When Matthias was chosen to replace Judas (Acts 1:21-26) Peter outlined the qualification for being an Apostle as written by Luke in Acts 1:21-22: “Therefore it is necessary to choose one of the men who have been with us the whole time the Lord Jesus went in and out among us beginning from John's baptism to the time when Jesus was taken up from us. For one of these must become a witness with us of his resurrection” (NIV). The qualifications listed are they must be Men; they must have been with Jesus and the other disciples or apostles from the time of John’s Baptism to the resurrection of Jesus and must be a witness with them of Jesus resurrection which means they must be witnesses to the resurrected Jesus.
The Original 12 Apostles
The Twelve originally chosen personally by Jesus who he named Apostles is recorded in the Gospels. These are the names of the twelve apostles: first, Simon (who is called Peter) and his brother Andrew; James son of Zebedee, and his brother John; Philip and Bartholomew; Thomas and Matthew the tax collector; James son of Alphaeus, and Thaddaeus; Simon the Zealot and Judas Iscariot, who betrayed him. Matthew 10:2-4 (NIV).
1. Peter: His original name was Simon however Jesus gave him the name Peter in Mark 3:16. He was also known as: Simon bar Jonah, Simon bar Jochanan, Cephas (The Rock), and is most commonly known as Simon Peter. He was born in Bethsaida on the Sea of Galilee. He was also a leader of the early Christian church and reportedly the first Roman Catholic Pope. He was also acquainted with the later Apostle Paul and the letters 1 and 2 Peter bears his name. Tradition holds that Peter was crucified upside down by the Romans during the reign of Emperor Nero as reported by Origen.
2. Andrew: He was the brother of Peter (Simon) and was one of the disciples of John the Baptist. He was also born in Bethsaida on the Sea of Galilee and tradition holds that he was crucified on an X shaped cross at Patrae where two ends were buried in the ground because he criticized the Achaian proconsul for idolatry.
Note: Peter and Andrew were fishermen by trade on the Sea of Galilee and when Jesus saw them casting their net into the water he told them “Come, follow me, Jesus said, and I will make you fishers of men” Matthew 4:19
3. James: This is the first James that Jesus chose and he was a son of Zebedee. He was also known as James the Greater to distinguish him from James the son of Alphaeus and was one of the first disciples to follow Jesus. He was also the first of The Twelve to be martyred and was put to death with a sword by Herod Agrippa (Acts 12:1-2)
4. John: He was the older brother of James and is known as the disciple whom Jesus loved and John of Patmos. His Gospel John bears his name as do his letters 1, 2 and 3 John. After the death and resurrection of Jesus John (John 19:27) took Mary the mother of Jesus to Ephesus to live with him. John was later taken from Ephesus to prison on the Island of Patmos by Domitian in the Aegean Sea 50 miles southeast of Ephesus where he wrote Revelation in 95 AD. After his release he returned to Ephesus where he died five years later in about 100 AD of old age and his traditional tomb is thought to be located in Selcuk near Ephesus where he and Mary lived.
Note: “To them (The Sons Of Zebedee) he gave the name Boanerges, which means Sons of Thunder. (Mark 3:17)
5. Philip: Like Peter and Andrew was from Bethsaida (John 1:43) and he was also known as Philip the Evangelist. Tradition holds that he died as a martyr at Hierapolis in Phrygia after being flogged, imprisoned, and later crucified.
6. Bartholomew: Other than being named as an apostle in the Gospels he is only mentioned one other time as a witness to the Ascension. Tradition holds that he preached in India or Armenia and was said to have been tortured, flayed alive or crucified upside down in India.
7. Matthew: His original name was Levi and he was also known as Matthew the tax collector from Capernaum. His Gospel Matthew bears his name. Legend has it that he preached in unspecified foreign nations and tradition holds that he died by a halberd which is a pike fitted with an ax head in Nadabah.
8. Thomas: He was also known as Judas Thomas Didymus and Doubting Thomas because he didn’t believe it when told of Jesus' Resurrection. Like Bartholomew is thought by some to have been killed in India but with a spear or a lance.
9. James: This is the second James Jesus chose and he was the son of Alphaeus. He was also known as James the Less, James the Younger and James the Just and is only mentioned a few times in the New Testament. Tradition holds that he was beaten or clubbed to death in Jerusalem but his death is really unknown.
10. Thaddeus: He was also known as Judas the son of James, Jude of James, Jude Thaddaeus, Judas Thaddaeus, Lebbaeus but most commonly referred to as Judas not Iscariot. He was also identified with Jude Jesus brother. He was said by some to have been crucified at Edessa but like James his death is really unknown.
11. Simon: He was also known as Simon Zelotes but most commonly known as Simon the Zealot because he was a member of the Zealots sect who held strong political views. Some say that he was crucified in Britain but like James and Thaddaeus his death is really unknown.
12. Judas Iscariot: He was also known as Judas the son of Simon but is most commonly known as the disciple who betrayed Jesus. He committed suicide by hanging himself from a tree (Matthew 27:5) after betraying Jesus.
Additional Apostles
Matthias: In order to bring the number back up to twelve after Judas hanged himself Matthias was chosen by the remaining eleven apostles to take his place (Acts 1:25-26). His Gospel bearing his name was not included in the cannon of scripture. Tradition holds that he was stoned and then beheaded in Jerusalem.
Paul: His original name was Saul and he was known as Paul the Apostle, the Apostle Paul or Paul of Tarsus and was called by Jesus after his ascension to be an apostle to the Gentiles (Acts 9:1-31). Tradition holds that he was stripped naked and beheaded by the command of Nero along the Appian Way.
Barnabas: His original name was Joseph (Of Cyprus) but he was called Barnabas by the apostles meaning Son of Encouragement and was referred to as an apostle in Acts 14:14. He was a leader in the early church and he is the one who first brought Paul to the apostles who were afraid of him until he told them how Paul had seen and spoke to the Lord on the road to Damascus and told them how he preached fearlessly in the name of Jesus. He accompanied Paul on his first missionary journey and he was from the Jewish tribe of Levi (Levite’s carried out temple duties) and he was the cousin of John Mark who wrote the Gospel Mark. He died in 61 AD in Salamis, Cyprus.
James: This James is the brother of Jesus and was refereed to as an apostle by Paul in Galatians 1:19.
Silas: Also known as Silvanus was refereed to as an apostle by Paul in 1 Thessalonians 2:7. He accompanied Paul on his second missionary journey. He died in 50 AD in Macedonia.
Jesus: Jesus Christ was also called an apostle in Hebrews 3:1-6 as well as high priest greater than Moses.
Andronicus and Junias: This may have been husband and wife like Priscilla and Aquila. They are only referred to once in the New Testament in Romans 16:7 as being of note, outstanding and highly respected among the apostles. Some scholars take this to mean that they were apostles. If this is the case then Junias would be the only female apostle in the New Testament.
The debate centers on the wording of the scripture. The King James and the New King James versions state they are “of note among the apostles” and the New International Version states “They are outstanding among the apostles” and finally the New Living Translation states “They are highly respected among the apostles”. There is a footnote in the New Living Translation that reads: “Junia is a feminine name. Some late manuscripts accent the word so it reads Junias, a masculine name; still others read Julia (feminine).” In the Revised Standard Version they are both referred to as Men in verse 7 which states: “They are men of note among the apostles” yet in the New Revised Standard Version they are called “Prominent among the apostles”
Most scholars state that they were Apostles based on the scripture even though they did not meet the qualification listed by Peter. Still the debate rages on as to if the scripture says they were of note, outstanding, respected or prominent among or with the apostles or were they of note, outstanding, respected or prominent apostles.
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The King James Bible Language Debate
The King James Version (KJV) of the Bible with its Elizabethan language like the Puritans and Pilgrims spoke or Spake is very hard to understand and much of it is even harder to read out loud with its antiquated outdated language. For me the language is just too difficult to read let alone comprehend much like the works by William Shakespeare (1564–1616) who penned his famous Plays and Sonnets when the King James Version was assembled and then printed.
Many claim that the King James Version is the only “Real” or authentic English version of the bible translated from Masoretic Hebrew and Greek texts and first published in 1611 in England as the “Authorized King James Version” since it was authorized by King James I of England (1566–1625). This may be true simply because it was the first commonly available English translation thanks in part to the invention of movable type printing developed by Johannes Gutenberg (1398-1468) and his Gutenberg press. Prior to that works in the cannon of scripture that make up the Bible had to be transcribed by hand by Monks and the like and were commissioned by wealthy patrons and was not readily available to the masses. Most of the people living then could not read or write and books that make up the bible such as the scrolls of the Old Testament that the Jew had and the Dead Sea Scrolls of the Essenes were available to the Priests, the wealthy and learned educated patrons.
As a result of that little invention the most common edition of the Bible available today is the 1987 edition printing of the King James Version which is in the public domain which means there is no Copyright for it. With this in mind you do not have to adhere to all of the Copyright limitation rules, qualifications and regulations like the ever so slightly updated version the New King James Version (NKJV) and other versions and that is in part why it is so popular:
Copyright Information
The text of the New King James Version® (NKJV®) may be quoted or reprinted without prior written permission with the following qualifications:
Up to and including 1,000 verses may be quoted in printed form as long as the verses quoted amount to less than 50% of a complete book of the Bible and make up less than 50% of the total work in which they are quoted; all NKJV quotations must conform accurately to the NKJV text.
Any use of the NKJV text must include a proper acknowledgment as follows:
"Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved."
However, when quotations from the NKJV text are used in church bulletins, orders of service, Sunday School lessons, church newsletters and similar works in the course of religious instruction or services at a place of worship or other religious assembly, the following notice may be used at the end of each quotation: "NKJV."
Publications such as Lifeway’s Open Windows and their Life Ventures quarterlies use the King James Version quotations for that reason as well as other publishers and that is one of the reasons why the King James Version is so popular. With the internet the King James Version can be posted, published or quoted in its entirety without restraint so that it can be read on line from many web sites or even downloaded to your computer. Since it is so easy to get that too contributes to its popularity. However just because it is so easy to get for free does not make the best Bible version translation out there.
Because it was written in the 17Th century which is the Early Modern period (1601-1700) it is nearly 4 centuries old and it contains language that was spoken by those such as William Shakespeare who were living when the 1611 edition was printed. This was also about the time that the flintlock musket and the refracting telescope were invented and Ice cream, Tea and coffee were just becoming popular in Europe. Jamestown the first English colony in America was only settled by the Pilgrims five years before in 1607.
It is not the worst version of the Bible out there because it does not change the original scriptures that are the inspired word of God to reflect personal agendas - I leave that distinction to the New World Translation (NTW) version of the Watchtower societies Jehovah's Witnesses with its theologically motivated mistranslations. Bibles such as The Message (MSG) bible which is in my opinion the worst “Christian” bible out there next to the Amplified Bible (AMP) with its lexicons hanging off each word try to update the language for the modern reader but fail short. I have to agree that the King James Version is very poetic however I prefer the New International Version (NIV) and the New Living Translation (NLT) over it however there is quite a bit of debate over which of them is the most accurate translation.
To read the bible as it was originally written as far as we know – due to the fact that Monks in Monasteries originally copied manuscripts by hand and had the opportunity to modify the text – you have to read Hebrew for the Old Testament books and Greek for the New Testament Books but the same problem of accuracy exists there. However that poses a problem as well. Much of the Old Testament was handed down by oral traditions and was not “written down” until centuries later. We have very old texts such as the Dead Sea Scrolls but we do not have any originals per se. The same can be said of the later New Testament scriptures which were written 400 years after Malachi as well. We know for a fact that the Epistles or letters of Paul and John’s book of Revelation were originally hand written as we read in the scriptures. However we have none of the original circular letters written 2000 years ago, but I digress.
The point is that the King James Version language is old fashion and laughable. When the King James Version scriptures are read out loud to groups of school aged children often times they giggle at the old language of the scriptures. The very young school aged children tend to think that it is funny and laugh and when they do so the scriptures loose their meaning. The New King James Version is better or should I say easier to read and understand but some the old language still exists.
For example Psalm 60:10 in the King James Version reads: Wilt not thou, O God, which hadst cast us off? and thou, O God, which didst not go out with our armies? Is one example of scripture that is both hard to read out loud or to your self and is hard to understand and comprehend. The New King James Version is much easier to read out loud or to your self and is easier to understand and comprehend: Is it not You, O God, who cast us off? And You, O God, who did not go out with our armies?
The New International Version which reads: Is it not you, O God, you who have rejected us and no longer go out with our armies? Is closest to the King James however the New Living Translation is easier to understand which reads: Have you rejected us, O God? Will you no longer march with our armies? The point here is that it doesn’t really matter what version of the Bible you read most of them from our Century convey the same message and there is no need to use the King James Version. You would not wear the clothes your family members wore 4 centuries ago so why would you read the same Bible version they read with language where Wilt, Thou, Hadst, Smote, Spake and Ye are used?
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